The First Day...Again

Last night, like a prisoner getting a last meal, I crammed in three big chocolate chip cookies; you know, the desperate eating spree that precedes the promise to be better tomorrow. When I stepped on the scales this morning, I weighed 170.6. That’s a loss; small to be sure, but it’s still a loss.

I thought it would be a good, albeit humbling, idea to check a weight/height/age calculator to see where I fall BMI-wise. Here’s a big shock: I’m officially overweight. Dang. And instead of being just over the line on the side of overweight, I’m smack-dab in the middle of overweight, so I can’t even falsely comfort myself by whispering at my reflection, “Well, you’re just a little overweight.”

                Now to address the daily vs. weekly vs. the no-scales at all weigh-in issue: I am aware that health/weight loss experts are divided on the optimal schedule for keeping on track. Some say weighing oneself every day is ineffective and obsessive; others say it makes one aware of small gains that can turn into big gains if one doesn’t pay attention. I am a daily weigher, and I have to say I’m pretty obsessive about it. However, I was weighing myself every day even as I regained all the weight I had worked so hard to lose on WW. It’s not like I didn’t step on the scales for three years so that I was totally unprepared for the news that I’d squandered away a 40-pound weight loss.  Instead it went something like this: Oh, I see I’ve gained five pounds. Ah, that’s nothing. I’ll burn that off with a couple of good walks and I’ll watch my points…Hmmm, ten pounds. Damn. Get yourself together now or you’re going to be fat again…Mmmmmm, tiramisu. One serving won’t hurt, right? Christmas cookies? They’re little and they’re only around for a few weeks. Besides, I should eat them all so they’re not just hanging around tempting me…Huh, twenty pounds. Maybe I was too thin before I gained them. I can live with 150; that’s a good healthy weight. Yup, still okay on the BMI chart. In fact, I have a little room to spare. SparkPeople addressed the weighty question (Hee hee), saying that, according to the obligatory “recent study,” daily weigh-ins and a support system keep people from gaining weight. I can’t explain my failure, but I am going to stick with stepping on the scales every morning ala Bridget Jones (without the cigarette count. Heyyy, I weighed a whole lot less when I smoked…Eh, an oxygen tank packs on some pounds, though). 

                So here’s the breakdown for today:  

	SparkPeople Guidelines	My Tracker
Calories	1200 – 1550	1385
Carbs	163 – 236	182
Fat	32 – 56	56
Protein	60 – 127	51

                I even had a chocolate chip cookie and ate lunch at Panera. On the downside, I got in only a 15-minute walk today because it was Caleb’s last day at home for Christmas, and I wanted to spend quality time watching him play an online game. He did take a break – to go to Panera. Food is definitely the way to that boy’s heart. And attention. But on the upside, Bill and I walked up a killer hill, the kind that makes breathing very difficult and talking impossible. Wait a minute. I think I just figured out why he suggested we do the hill.

                It’s 7:19 p.m. and I’m considering going to bed now just to shut up those darn chocolate chip cookies in the freezer.

                Well done, you (ala Bridget Jones, too).